So this post is a bit different. It will be not as related to the Fundamentalist as most of my posts have been. This is something that I feel I need to talk about and get off my chest.
Bullying affects just about anyone. Even the people doing the bullying have been bullied, I guarantee it. Bullying has also claimed many lives and victims. 4, 400 people commit suicide every year over this. 14% have admitted to thinking of suicide while 9% have actually done it. And who knows of those that go on behind closed doors or churches or cults.
Bullying causes many things, all of which is horrible. Depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and in some cases death. People suffer so much at the hands and words of bullies. Sad to say a lot of the victims go unnoticed. Many adults believe that it is just a part of growing up. It shouldn’t be. It should never be normal for someone to have to live their life hating it because of what someone said or did to them.
That brings me to how much the words hurt. I was once told at a church, by a pastor’s wife, that words can’t really hurt us. After all they are only words. She was wrong. Sometimes words can hurt worse than someone actually causing you physical pain. When I was told I was fat and would never find someone to love me, it left me feeling worthless. Like my life was trash. When I was called a whore and a slut, that cut me to the core, especially since someone in my family called me this. It would have hurt a lot worse if they had stabbed me. Those words that people say, never go away.
Victims of bullying, carry those wounds, visible or not, their whole life. On the worst of days memories will come back to haunt them and leave them feeling insecure and alone. Once that seed of doubt that the victim is worthless is planted in their mind, it is hard to shake. Even if the victim knows that what the bully said isn’t true, doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.
How many times have pastors from pulpits said that kids who cut themselves or commit suicide are the low life of society? I can’t speak for other churches but I know mine believed that. Most pastor’s condemn these kids who have such thoughts. They counsel them saying that God is punishing them because they didn’t tithe, or win that soul to Christ, or pray that extra minute. You get the picture. Many times in cults, the pastors/ leaders are the biggest bullies.
Bullying needs to end. It should be illegal, but sad to say its isn’t. Too many people believe it is a phase in life. No. Those bullies become adults. They bully their girlfriend, wife, husband, kids, and others. It doesn’t end there. Some times the victims themselves become the bullies. They figure it is better than being put down every day. It is a cycle. A long, vicious cycle that has yet to end.
To all the victims of bullying: You are strong, powerful, and better than all of this. You are a warrior in more ways imaginable. Those scars will one day be your battle wound. Proof of where you have been and that you have made it. Stay strong.
The statistics used above were from bullyingstatistics.org. Very good site and I highly recommend looking it up and reading some of their articles.