There is a life after the cult

My name is Debby. I was born and raised to be a Bible believing Independent Fundamental Baptist. Well, I never turned out to be just that.

I left the fundamentalist three years ago this August. It was scary. I left my family, friends, and everything behind. I knew though that if I stayed there that my life would be incomplete and empty. So I took that leap into the dark and set out for a new life.

There were many reasons why I choose to leave the cult. First of all, I didn’t believe the things that they were teaching me. Why shouldn’t a woman have the same rights as any man out there? Why wasn’t secular music ok? Why do I have to wear skirts down past my knees? Why can’t I be whoever it is that I want to be? Those were some of the very many different questions that I had when leaving.

Secondly, since when is a pastor a god? He is a man just like any other person out there. Where I grew up you didn’t question the pastor. It was either do as he says or get humiliated publicly.( And I do remember the many times where people were called out by name and their “sins” called out.) Pastors are, seriously, way overrated in the Independent Fundamental Baptist (IFB) churches. They are human.

Lastly, and this is the main reason I left. The abuse was rampant. Physical, emotional, mental, religious, sexual, and I am sure many others. Many of the victims of this abuse are young, innocent children. Sermons were preached how it was ok to “break the will” of a child by spanking them until they were black and blue. If a girl was molested or raped, nine times out of ten, she was told it was her fault. She must have been dressed immodest. These are just a couple of illustrations. I could sit here all day and tell you so many more that I have heard and seen through the years.

I am not anti Christian. Most of my family and friends who are outside of the IFB churches are Christians. I am however anti abuse and mind control.

My goal is to help people who have come from or are still in the IFB cult. And I also want to encourage people to go after whatever they want from life. Because the past is just that, it is the past. The future is up to you to create.

 

 

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6 thoughts on “There is a life after the cult

  1. I am glad you are out of the IFB. I was also raised a fundamentalist Baptist, but I left in the 1970s. I think it has gotten much worse since then. I hope your transition is relatively easy.

    You have many supportive former fundamentalist Baptists here in the blogsoshere.

  2. Mike says:

    Hello Debby, I just stumbled across your blog and appreciate the posts that you’ve made. My wife and I came out of the IFB culture about a year ago in much the same way that you described in this post. It was very difficult as we lost a lot of our family, nearly all of our “friends” and had to sever ties with most of our kids friends. We’re still trying to figure it all out and how to be “ourselves”. We got into the IFB cult when we were 17 and wasted 15 years of our lives there. Our only hope is that we got out early enough that there isn’t any permanent damage to our kids. You seem to be going in the right direction, so keep it up!

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